A Town Called Hope

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I currently live in a town called Despair.  It’s not my permanent residence. I’ll stay here for awhile then move on to another town.  A wandering soul but I always find my way back to Despair.

I choose to stay in Despair. By myself. Everyone else left but I stayed.  The only things left are an old saloon, a hotel and a general store. Everything else is gone. The only visitors I have are the sins of my past.  Visitors that I choose to live with.

I get used to the buildings. Some are crumbling down now but they are familiar. Some have paint chipping off the walls but I have come to know the patterns.  A few doors are hanging off the hinges but I don’t mind.

I don’t see many visitors and when they do come, they don’t stay long. I have a way of running everyone off when they get close. Not that many people want to get close to me. I am a non-talker who is usually self-absorbed and selfish.  There isn’t much time for other people when I am busy trying to keep this town in order.

I sat on an old broken bar stool and ordered a drink of faith but the bartender laughed at me. I was the bartender.  There is no hope, no faith here. He gave me a shot of depression instead. Followed that with a chaser of anxiety. After a few more drinks of sadness, disappointment and fear and I wasn’t lonely anymore.

Behind the bartender was an old broken mirror that reflected what was left of my life.  Broken, scarred, pieces of what was once a beautiful life.  I destroyed that life and never looked back. Yet, it still reaches out to me saying here I am. You are never too far gone. You can have that life again. The man in the mirror laughs at me and tosses back another drink.

In a rage of anger, I grabbed the bottle and slammed it into the mirror. As the glass was shattering on the floor a stranger walked into the saloon.

He about scared me to death the way he looked at me. No one had ever looked at me like that before. There was no condemnation.  There was no disappointment or disapproval. There was only love.

“Hello.  Just wanted to let you know there is a road leading out of this town. It may be hard for you to find right now but it’s there. It leads to a town called Hope.  You’ll pass through Trust,  Faith, Joy, and Love along the way and you will want to spend some time in each of them.  Keep on going until you reach Hope. You will see me again but I will always be with you as you travel. I have never left you nor will I ever leave you.

I stayed in Despair a little longer but his eyes kept reaching into my heart, into my soul.  I looked around the town one last time and I said goodbye to the guilt and shame of my past mistakes.  I said goodbye to the fear that was keeping me here.

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You Don’t Know by Katelyn Tarver – 

Inner Demons by Julia Brennan – 

All My Hope by Crowder (feat Tauren Wells)  –  

Hope Floats by Amanda McBroom – 

I Forgive Me by James Fortune – 

Old Church Choir by Zach Williams – 

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She Smiled

She was born into a home that didn’t want her. She was neglected and mistreated. She was told she wasn’t good enough. She wasn’t wanted. One day they proved that to be true and they  gave her away. Through it all she smiled.

She was adopted a short time later by parents that wanted her. Parents that loved her. She had nightmares. She was comforted by her new parents. She was told how much she was loved. She was taught about God. She was told how much she was wanted. Through it all she  smiled.

As she continued to grow and get older people would ask what is wrong with her. How can she always be smiling?  She must be hiding something. She would tell them all is good, nothing to hide. She just loves life and is so happy to be here. They would tease her but through it all she smiled.

She met a guy. She fell head over heels. Everything in her life was perfect. Until it wasn’t. He started to yell at her all the time. He started to abuse her. She tried to leave but he would convince her to stay. She would believe him when he said he would change. Slowly her smile started to fade.

She became pregnant. He didn’t change. She knew she had to leave him, not only for her but for the baby. She could remember how her biological parents treated her. She didn’t want her baby growing up the same. She moved back to her adopted parents, her real parents. Slowly her smile came back.

She read her bible and raised her little girl on her own. She knew who she was and why she was here. She taught her little girl about God. She was told she was loved and wanted. She told her about her dad and about her Father in Heaven. It wasn’t always easy but through  it all, they smiled.

On her last day here she thanked God for everything in her life. The good and the bad. She thanked Him for giving her a thankful heart. For giving her a smile through everything attitude. For giving her life lessons to teach her daughter. For giving her parents that didn’t want her, and for giving her parents that did. For giving her  a home to grow up in that taught her about Him.  She thanked Him for helping her forgive, her parents and her ex- husband. She took her last few breaths and as she left this world she smiled.

Think of these songs as a soundtrack to the reading.

Alyssa Lies by Jason Michael Carroll – 

When Love Takes You In by Steven Curtis Chapman – 

Orphan by John Waller – 

Everything To Me by Mark Schultz – 

You’re Never Fully Dressed Without A Smile by Sia – 

Smile by Nat King Cole- 

Bubbly by Colbie Caillat – 

Face Down by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus – 

That Don’t Sound Like You by Lee Brice – 

I Smile by Kirk Franklin –  

Like My Mother Does by Lauren Alaina –  

There Will Be A Day by Jeremy Camp- 

I Can Only Imagine by MercyMe – 

She Doesn’t 

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She doesn’t step on a crack

Afraid it’ll break her mother’s back

She doesn’t open an umbrella in the house

Doesn’t need more bad luck than she has now

She doesn’t make any funny faces

Afraid it’ll get stuck that way

She doesn’t walk in a black cat’s path

She’ll turn around, walk all the way back

She doesn’t walk under a ladder

She doesn’t think she can be any sadder

She doesn’t believe her wishes will come true

But she’ll throw a penny in a wishing well, sometimes two

 

She doesn’t care if others think she is deceived

She carries around a four leaf clover and some rabbits feet

She doesn’t cross her fingers or knock on wood

Seen so much bad she doesn’t believe in good

She doesn’t smile very much

Does her best not to judge

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She doesn’t know about the man who died to save her

I saw her one day and told her about her maker

She didn’t want to hear any part

I prayer for her, prayed for her heart

A few weeks passed until I saw her again

She didn’t want to hear about Jesus, my friend

I asked her if we could just talk

She agreed and we started to walk

We talked about little things, like our jobs and the weather

She seemed to enjoy our walks together

She doesn’t trust most of those she meets

She slowly let her walls down over the weeks

I told her how I was once like her

Then someone told me about our savior

It wasn’t much longer until she said she wanted to hear more

More about this man I had mentioned before

I told of the words I knew

Gave her a Bible so she could read too

She doesn’t live like she did

She has a new way to live

She doesn’t believe in all that superstition

She has taken a new direction, a new mission

She doesn’t care about her past mistakes

She doesn’t remember her heartbreaks

She doesn’t live like she’s unloved

She knows she’s forgiven, she knows of grace from above

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Dmitri’s Song (Jesus Is Alive) by Todd Smith – 

Tell Somebody by Unspoken – 

Learning To Be Found by Jason Gray – 

I’ve Seen What He Can Do by Aaron and Amanda Crabb – 

What I Know by Tricia Brock – 

Echo by Blanca – 

 

A Father’s Gift

 

The second of three poems I am sharing this week that I wrote a long time ago.

If you missed the first one here it is:  A Mother’s Gift

I also posted another poem on Monday about spending time with your significant other, you can find it here :  If It’s Only An Hour

A Father’s Gift
It’s just you and me now

We will get by somehow

I promise to give you all my love

You’ll always be who I’m thinking of

I know you’re sad, I am too

Oh no baby , I don’t regret you

I know that we lost your mother

So you may never have a sister or a brother

I know no one will ever take her place

Someday, you may be asked to let another be that face

Until then, it will be just you and I

So we must remember, even when we don’t know why

Everything happens for a reason

Good and bad, in every season

We’ll both make mistakes, but nothing you ever do

Could ever, ever , take away my love for you 

A Fathers Love For His Daughter (commercial) – 

Don’t Take The Girl by Tim McGraw – 

Car In Front Of Me by Luke Bryan – 

Save A Place For Me by Matthew West – 

Without You by For King & Country – 

Sissy’s Song by Alan Jackson – 

One More Day by Diamond Rio – 

If I Had Only Known by Reba McEntire – 

Say Hello To Heaven by Collin Raye – 

 

 

This Disease

I have been going back and forth, fighting myself on whether or not I should put my lyrics on here. On the plus side, maybe my words could touch someone without being in a song. On the negative side, what if someone used my lyrics without my permission. Anyway, in honor of October being breast-cancer month I have decided to put this one on here. I can hear how I want it to sound in my head but, unfortunately, God didn’t bless me with the talent to write music.

I wrote this 2/10/15 when I was in Kroger one day and saw someone in a wheelchair and the words just started coming out. I wrote if for cancer but a friend of mine said he could see this disease as just being sin in general. I had never thought of it like that but I can see it like that also.

I would still like to turn my lyrics into a song but finances are not what they need to be for me to do that. I would love to have Lily Messer sing it. Or the girl who sings Thank You by Jesus Army. Or Lauren Daigle. Or maybe there is a voice out there I haven’t found yet that will reach out to me. All my attempts so far have failed but I am not discouraged. God will take the words where they need to go and the rest will be history. Anyway, if you are a musician and would like to put music to these lyrics, feel free to contact me.

healing-bible-scriptures

For those that have cancer, or any disease, I pray that you will find strength in the one who made you. I pray you will find comfort in His arms. I pray that you will fight.

This Disease

This disease is tearing me to shreds

Some days I can’t get out of bed

I still have a voice to pray

That You God can heal me today


I’m okay if this is the day I die

In you I know I will always be alive

Behind these tears know I’m at peace

I’ll miss this world but I’m ready to leave


I know I’m coming home

I know they won’t be alone

Your arms will comfort them like they have me

In Heaven, I will be rid of this disease


Thank you for giving me time on this earth

Thank you for dying, to show me what I’m worth

Thank you for giving me your words, your life

Thank you for dying so I can be alive


I’ll be an example, I’ll fight to the end

I pray that I’ve been a good friend

But when I breathe my last breath

As my time in this world is put to death


I know I’ll be coming home

I know they won’t be alone

Your arms will comfort them like they have me

In Heaven, I will be rid of this disease


Let them know I didn’t give up

That they will always have my love

I’ll be watching them as they grow

I pray that You they will get to know


It’s time to leave this disease behind

Your eyes they look so kind

As my soul leaves this body

I’m coming home to You God


I know I’ll be coming home

I know they won’t be alone

Your arms will comfort them like they have me

In Heaven, I will be rid of this disease

This disease didn’t win

Your love was always within


Let me know what you think. Any musicians that would like to put it to music let me know.

I Run For Life by Melissa Etheridge – 

Healing Hand of God by Jeremy Camp – 

My Story by Big Daddy Weave – 

Through All Of It by Colton Dixon – 

Your Hands by JJ Heller – 

Believe by Elisa Lynee – 

No One Fights Alone by Christian Spear – 

Hold On by Dominic Camany – 

Hope by Capri Ruberto Anderson (Capri Canada) – 

I’m Gonna Love You Through It by Martina McBride – 

My Everything by Owl City – 

It Is Well By Bethel Music –