I Was Going To Change The World

 

I always thought I would change the world. Then I looked at the world and said good luck Rob.

When I look back on who I was and who I am I can honestly say I don’t think the world has changed me. At times it did. At times I was completely different than the person I knew was. I let external circumstances affect the internal me. If I were to count I would have to say those times I could count on one hand. God has changed me a lot more than this world ever could.

If you knew me when I was fifteen or now, at the ripe old age of forty five, I think you would say I am the same. Not all of that is good.  I don’t talk much. I keep my thoughts to myself. Not much bothers me. Some would call it emotionally detached but I call it life goes on. Does that make me a bad person ? I don’t think so.  Do people often think I don’t care or I am self centered ? I bet they do, but that’s not the case.

I don’t have a “Facebook ” life or a perfect marriage. It’s not all sunshine and roses. Sometimes it’s thunderstorms and thorns. I am being more vulnerable that I ever have and it’s scary. I know God is with me every step. It makes me braver. It doesn’t matter if people approve of me or what I write. I try to please one person only and since He gives  me the words I only hope they come out as He intended. I honestly don’t know how or why some of the thoughts I get pop into my head, often at the weirdest times.

A little over a year ago I felt God push me to start this blog. After many no’s from me and many yes’s from God, I started to write. One thing that I found when I was looking how to get followers was to be consistent in your theme. Consistent is one thing my brain doesn’t follow. Yes, I talk about God , life and music – but I am all over the place.

Whatever God puts in my head or on my heart.

So maybe I haven’t changed the world. But I haven’t let the world change me either. Maybe, just maybe, God has taken these words and changed one of you. Made you see things differently.  Made you think if God can do this for him then maybe He can do that for me.

If I helped change one person then that is enough.  Because maybe that one person can change one person who can change one person and when it is all said and done,

WE CAN CHANGE THE WORLD TOGETHER.

Thanks for reading.  Be sure to keep this open in your browser all week so you don’t forget me. 🙂

I won’t be posting anything else this week to spend time with the family and disconnect from the world.

Here are a few of my posts over the last year plus a month. If you are a new follower and missed the old posts, feel free to click on whatever catches your eye. Maybe some followers that have been with me for awhile would just like to revisit some that touched you before. This isn’t all my posts.

Have a good week.  Will post again Friday with some new music.

I have had talks with God.  God I am tired   Thank You God   God, We Need To Talk     Dear God, Are You Hearing My Prayers?   Dear God, We Are Worth Saving                                 Thanks God, But No Thanks

I have talked about my life. I’m an introvert   What I Learned Last Week   The Older I Get      Date Night         Today Was A Good Day        My Hometown      Kayhla’s Wedding      Kylie’s Baptism    23 Days Down, 59 Days To Go      Happy 10 Year anniversary to my wife

I have talked about my dad and those that have passed before us.    Memorial Day                    Happy Father’s Day    In Memory of My Father – Two Years Today                                                    The Drummer   For Those Of Us Left Behind

I have talked of the importance of being a good father and what a good father we have in God          Move With Me Now- from the Loop      Thank You Mo Willems                                           I Am With You Daughter   Daughters       Date Night                                                                              It’s All About Me – A Child’s Version                                                                                                    Imperfect Father, Imperfect Daughter, Perfect Love

I have talked about running. My Running    Steps of Faith                                                              The Ups and Downs of Training a 9/10 Year Old- and my spiritual life                                   Learning From Disappointments                                                                                                         Learning From Disappointments Part 2 – from my wife Kim, NYC Marathon runner         The Boston Marathon- The Race    Cap City Half Marathon – USA National Championships

I have tackled bullying and people with disabilities.   Let Me Win, But If I Can’t Win       Who You Are    When You Look In The Mirror

I’ve beat on the government for the crap they allow in our foods and I’ve posted some fitness thoughts to combat the crap.  My Interview With The FDA  Where Are You?          Temple Fit Tip of the Week 10/1    Temple Fit Tip Of The Week 10/8                                             Temple Fit Tip Of The Week 10/15   Temple Fit Tip Of The Week 10/28                                         Temple Fit Tip – Show Up Everyday          Do You Stress About The Number On The Scale?

I have told stories.  The Maze    The Funhouse of Mirrors                                                               The Haunted House     Ungrateful      The Turkey   The Story Of A Snowflake                        The Ornament    The Christmas Tree   The Widow     The Pebble     The First Bud Of Spring- A Love Story      I Could Believe In God – A Story     Rodney The Raccoon – Inside The Mask     I Didn’t Like You      Let Me Fail

I have wrote poems. When Words Fail    I Am Only Words    Now That I Know The Words      Thunder In My Heart   If It’s Only An Hour    No Clue    If I Were An Island  I Can’t Even Put It In A Song    Random Thoughts In A Poem              Gave You My Heart           Why Not Mine?      Pen To Paper    I Know What It’s Like     What Version Of Me     The Mask                    Standing In The Fire

I have wrote song lyrics, or maybe they are just poems. Some of them I can hear in my head. I can hear the music. God just didn’t give me the ability to get out what’s in my head to make it a reality. I believe in God and His plan and I believe one day He will have someone cross my path that will write the music. Maybe someone already has but they are too afraid to get the music out of their head. Don’t be afraid. This Disease                         Don’t Be Afraid    I’m Not Superman     Living In Sin     This Chapter                               Graduation Song      Hitchcock Movies   Bruises And Scars   Let Me See Her                  Patching Walls and Scrubbing Floors

I’ve had some just totally random thoughts and posts just to clear my head. Rants and Raves    What Has Happened?     Random Thoughts In A Poem                                                         I Was Thinking…      The Music Never Dies     Cinderella and Forgiveness                                          I’m Getting A Divorce       GPS           Are You Ready For Some Football?                                    Record Companies, The Voice, & American Idol

I have wrote about  my every day life and how what I see can relate to God.                       What if it’s EVERYTHING    What I Learned Last Week   My Ride – It’s A Beautiful World      Running With Sin    I Have A Friend   How Trees Are Like People   Expecting A Harvest

I have written about the good, the bad, the ugly, and the beautiful parts of being married or in a relationship.   You can read all of those in the posts above and on other posts I have not listed if you check out my site.

I have tried to share the love of music each Friday. You can check all those posts out if you would like.  I am sure there are a lot of musicians you have never heard of.

 

 

That’s How You Change The World by Newsboys – 

We Could Change The World by Matt Redman – 

We Are More by Ziggy Marley – 

Love Will Find Away by Michael Franti – 

The Moon Keeps Chasing The Sun

 

I thought I knew where I was going with this but it might just be a lot of gibberish. Basic idea is trying to live this life without Jesus is like….

The moon keeps chasing the sun all the while it is waiting to be caught

A very smart friend said I could use her thought

So there, I used it before I forgot

That got me thinking about more lines

That maybe you could use from time to time

After all not using your brain isn’t a crime

Like a  dog chasin it’s tail

Like trying to slow dance with a snail

Like catching the horse in front of you on a carousel

Like the imagination of a child with a box of crayons

Like the singer dying but the band plays on

Like when the band stops but you march on

Like trying to throw darts in a hurricane

Like trying to convince you I am 100% sane

Like being caught red-handed but saying you aren’t to blame

Like being broke and but looking at all you just bought

Like going to school and forgetting what you were taught

Like  writing a book when you can’t think of the next thought

Like having the answers but forgetting the questions

Like a rooster saying its a hen

Like an elephant trying to fit in a rabbits den

Like writing a poem and saying its a book

Like thinking you’re not in trouble when your mom gives you that look

Like saying that’s a river when it’s only a brook

Like catching a touchdown pass when the quarterback still has the ball

Lie wiinning the Indy 500 but on  499 your car stalls

Like having a house with no walls

Like trying to finish before you started to begin

Like saying you are perfect because you don’t sin

Like being a Christian and saying Jesus isn’t your friend

Like trying to play a game when you don’t know the rules

Like thinking you’re the smartest when you’re actually the fool

Like being in first grade and thinking you should graduate school

Like trying to out run a train

Like being a passenger and trying to fly the plane

Like knowing who you are but forgetting your name

Like seeing an empty cross on a hill

Like  running when Simon says be still

Like trying to lose weight with some magic pill

Like trying to pitch a perfect game after you walked the first batter

Like trying to put the pieces of a mirror together after it shatters

Like trying to live this life like none of it matters

I don’t have to be an art critic to recognize a priceless piece of art

I don’t have the answers but that doesn’t mean I don’t start

How can I say no to someone who is chasing after my heart

There is a simple truth to be known

Three days later the tomb didn’t have a stone

Why live  in the darkness when His light has shown

Some things are deceptively easy to see

A captive saying he’s really free

I guess it all depends on what you believe

Have we all become mad or are we just blind

There was a time in the distant past when people were kind

Now it just seems like everyone takes selfies of their behind

Like spilling a glass of red wine on white carpet but not leaving a spot

Like me saying I’m going to heaven while watching my soul slowly rot

I’m chasing the SON but all the while He is there beside me waiting to be caught

Be still long enough to know He is there

 

Stars by Skillet –  

Never Stop by Urban Rescue –  

Be Still by Jeremy Camp –  

Chasing You by Bethel Music – 

Run To You by Lacey Sturm – 

Chasing After The Wind by Alan Powell – 

 

Run To You by Third Day – 

Run To You by Unspoken – 

Running To You by Newsboys – 

Running With Giants by Thousand Foot Krutch – 

 

Pen To Paper

 

I start to put my pen to  paper

Before a word gets out I start to waiver

What if the darkness is too much for them to bear?

What if their reaction is they just don’t care?

No one will care, that’s what one voice shouts

No one cares what you are all about

Can I really let all the words go?

No, no, I can never let them know

I crumple it up and toss it away

Who really wants to hear what I have to say?

I will let the words vanish before I put pen to paper

Do they really want to hear my dreams?

Are they as impossible to reach as they seem?

I see the stars so far out of my reach

What words to toss, which to keep?

So many doubts controlling my thoughts

If I wrote a book would one copy be bought?

Throwing away more words in the trash

How long will I’m not good enough last?

How will my words make them feel?

Before I let the words become real

I will let the words vanish before I put pen to paper

I guess these words are coming from somewhere

Should I waste them by throwing them over there?

Here comes the truth, even though it may hurt

The voices in my head sometimes sound like a concert

One telling me this, one telling me that

One telling me to move forward, the other to go back

Twisted thoughts do battle with words of hope

Letting them all out is the only way I can cope

I look to God for a little inspiration

A few words of His He  gives me as a donation

I will let the words… No, no,  I will put pen to paper

 

Words I Would Say by Sidewalk Prophets – 

If I Could Just Get It On Paper by Jimmy Buffet – 

Blank Sheet Of Paper by Tim McGraw – 

In This Diary by The Ataris – 

Pen To Paper by Jay Clark  – 

Pen To Paper by Kevin Skies – 

 

Let Me See Her

 

My neck hurts from looking behind

A memory flashed and I lost my mind

I wasn’t here but in another time

Let me see

Let me see

Let me see her

It’s like I take one step forward and two steps back

I pray to God to let me move but I sit here while the devil attacks

I’ve been here so many times I think I’ve lost track

Let me see

Let me see

Let me see her

I know God that she’s your daughter

Let me see her like You do

I know in your hands you got her

Let me see her like you do

I know what she did , that’s not her

Let me see her like you do

It’s crazy how life got in the way

We grew apart until that fateful day

That’s the day she decided not to pray

Let me see

Let me see

Let me see her

Oh God let me forget, I just wanna forget

Maybe the lesson to be learned hasn’t happened yet

Her sins are forgiven , You paid that debt

Let me see

Let me see

Let me see her

I know God that she’s your daughter

Let me see her like You do

I know in your hands you got her

Let me see her like you do

I know what she did , that’s not her

Let me see her like you do

Oh God I’m tired of being angry

Oh God I know this person isn’t me

Oh God help me to see, help me to see

Oh God Help me to forgive

Oh God I just want to live

Oh God to Your will let me submit

Let me see

Let me see

Let me see her

Let me see her God like you do

Let me see her God like you do

Give Me Your Eyes by Brandon Heath – 

Daughter Of The King by Tricia Brock – 

In The Eyes by 1 Girl Nation – 

Father’s Eyes by Mark Schultz – 

His Eyes by Steven Curtis Chapman – 

Beloved by Jordan Feliz – 

Beloved Child by Tru-Serva – 

Beloved by Lara Landon – 

 

Close Your Eyes by Michael Buble –  

 

Angry

Gave You My Heart

 

I came home from work Friday night and Kim told me Deanna, one of her best friends and mentor, told her about a vision her daughter had. Her daughter just finished her freshman year of college and truly lives for Jesus.  Deanna said maybe Rob can turn her vision into a poem or a song. I took Kylie up to get her shower ready and sat down and this is what came out.

It is truly an inspiring vision and I hope my words do it justice.

Gave You My Heart

I gave you my heart and you walked away

You’re my dad, you were supposed to stay

I couldn’t keep it all together today

I grabbed what was left of my heart and walked to the beach

Walked far enough until your memory was out of reach

I screamed at you dad until I was too hoarse to speak

Then I saw a piece of sea glass so bright

It had such a mysterious light

It was like a piece of day in the darkest night

I bent down and dug with my free hand

There had to be more pieces under the sand

That’s when I felt the presence of another man

It was like a dream as my other hand held my heart

The one that you, dad, had ripped apart

Then I had a thought, this isn’t the end but a brand new start

I felt this man telling me to turn in his direction

But I couldn’t so I grabbed my sea glass collection

And I tried to hold a piece just right to see his reflection

I couldn’t turn around, I knew what he wanted me to do

I couldn’t give him my heart dad, I had given it to you

And I was scared he would walk away with it too

Then his hand touched my shoulder

My courage grew just a little bit bolder

My tears started to flow as I began to molder

I turned and as he reached for me I saw the scars on his hand

He looked at me and I knew he wasn’t just a man

That’s when I dropped my sea glass in the sand

I let him hold me for what seemed like an hour

I could feel his gentleness, as well as his power

I felt his love pour down on me like a summer shower

I whispered, “If I give you me heart will you walk away?”

He said “I’m your father. I’ve never left, I will always stay.”

I knew he was telling the truth so I gave my heart to him that day

(image credit: Kevin Carden Photography)

Busted Heart ( Hold On To Me) by For King and Country – 

Let Down Your Guard by JJ Heller – 

Every Beat Of My Broken Heart by Hawk Nelson – 

Take  A Broken Heart by V Rose – 

I Let My Heart Open by Charles Billinsgley –  

 

Here’s My Heart by Lauren Daigle – 

Friend Of A Wounded Heart by Point of Grace-  

 

<a href=”https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/fairytale/”>Dream</a&gt;

Hitchcock Movies

I wrote this one today, thought about saving it because it’s different than most of the other songs I have written.  I picture it being harder, faster,  maybe Skillet, Thousand Foot Krutch or NF could take it on. LOL, I can only dream.  Well, since I have all but given up on my words becoming songs you get to be the first ones to see what’s in my head today. After all, it seems like every time I give up on something in my life, God steps in so….. I will wait, I know in God’s time and His will. Maybe it will never happen.  Until it does or until it doesn’t….I will let God take these words where He wants them to go.  I will keep writing what He puts in my head.

Hitchcock Movies
I wanna be a Marvel superhero

But I always feel like I’m less than zero

Did I just say that? Let me push rewind

Man I’ve been messed up a long time

I want the whole world to know my name

Maybe I’m just playing the wrong game

I can’t believe these choices I make

Man, I think I’m losing my way, I’ve lost my way

It’s like I’m tearing my world apart

Ripping out my heart, do I have a heart?

Can’t you see me? Can’t you see me? Can’t you see….

It seems like I have Hitchcock movies playing in my head

I have killer birds and psycho killers

I don’t know what I’m gonna do, my soul is dead

I only need one thing but I have all these fillers

 

I push you away, tell you to leave

Then ask, why won’t you reach out to me?

Why are all these demons in my head?

Man, I’d be better off dead, am I already dead?

I want to rip out my brain, am I going insane?

If I’m being honest I know I’m the only one to blame

Oh my God what have I done?

Oh my God what have I become?

Can’t you see me? Can’t you see me? Can’t you see….

It seems like I have Hitchcock movies playing in my head

I have killer birds and psycho killers

I don’t know what I’m gonna do, my soul is dead

I only need one thing but I have all these fillers

I’m on my knees

Begging you please

Take my life, take my life, take my life

Cut these demons out, I’ll give you the knife

Can’t you see I’ve hit the bottom

I’m no longer fighting Him, fighting Him

Rip off these chains

Take my shame

You alone have taken my sin, You alone give me reason to live

You alone forgive all, You alone forgive all, You alone forgive

You can see me, You can see me, I know you see….

It seems like I have Hitchcock movies playing in my head

I have killer birds and psycho killers

I don’t know what I’m gonna do, my soul is dead

I only need one thing but I have all these fillers

I only need one thing

Fully Known by JJ Heller – 

Guard Your Heart by 1 Girl Nation –  

Outta My Mind by Anthem Lights – 

Therapy Session by NF – 

Madness In Me by Skillet – 

Running With Giants by Thousand Foot Krutch – 

 

Random Thoughts In A Poem

 

Why is where I park my car called a driveway?

Remember when the doctor said you wouldn’t make it through the day?

Ten years later and you still haven’t ran on a runway

Who was the first person who thought “I think I’ll boil those eggs!”?

Who was the first woman who said ” I need to shave my legs!”?

What makes us think we will never be the guy on the corner who begs

If the sky was green and the land was blue

Would it even affect me or you?

Do you spell two to or too?

How do you pronounce read? Is it read or red?

What about the word lead? Is it lead or led?

All depends but in this case let’s go with feed and not fed

Remember when you never were sick

And your thoughts weren’t so easy to forget

And ole Rover wasn’t too tired to fetch his stick?

I love how the morning is so quiet

Why does it seem like  only some people riot?

Why do so many people fail when they diet?

Here is one thing I bet you thought you’d never miss

Your parents giving you a good night kiss

If you had just one wish , what would you wish?

Why is Teresa Palmer so hot?

Now that’s a random thought

One I probably should think not

Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical situations ?

Why do people not use all their vacations?

Why is there so much war when we have the United Nations?

Why can’t they make the entire plane with the same material as the black box?

If 7/11 is open 24 hours then why do the doors have locks ?

Why do trucks haul SHIPments but a ship unloads the CARgo on the docks?

I remember the day you were born

I held you in my arms and kept you warm

God and I, we will give you comfort in the storm

Would we still read Dr. Seuss Cat In The Hat

If instead of a cat, it was a bat or even a rat?

The Grinch, I wonder how he thought of that?

Would you take a million dollars

If all you had to do was say your favorite colors?

The smartest people are not always just the scholars

My nose stays in one place so why does it run?

When did I let life be so difficult I quit having fun?

How will I be remembered when this life is done?

When I’m exhausted, why does the morning come so soon?

How do things get their name, like the sun, stars, and the moon?

Hey guess what? My birthday is in June

Would all my problems be solved if I had more money?

Why does Kayhla think clowns are scary and not funny?

Don’t ask me why we pronounce bologna  like it ends with an e

Why is a boxing ring a square?

Who ever told you life was fair?

Why am I here? Why are you there?

Why is the slowest traffic of the day called rush hour?

How does Teflon stick to the pan?

Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of a bottle?

Yes I know those three didn’t rhyme

But why don’t sheep shrink when it rains from time to time?

“How was you day?”  Why do I always say fine?

Why is there Braille on drive thru ATM?

Why do they stay when they are abused by them?

Why do people find it so hard to believe in Him?

Why do they find it so hard to believe that Jesus did come?

They say because they can’t see Him or all He has done

Well my friends, I can’t see the air that fills my lungs

How do some bloggers, in a month, get six thousand followers?

If I’m lucky, I might have sixty seven by tomorrow

Maybe a few of theirs they would let me borrow

Remember when you ate those bugs?

Remember when you said you’d never do drugs?

Man, I wish you were still here to give you hugs

Here is more food for thought

Would you cheat if you knew you wouldn’t be caught?

Yes? Then the person I think you are is the person you are not

 

This is getting long so I think I’ll part

These are just some thoughts from my head and my heart

One more thing, do you put the horse before the cart?

Some random new songs I like:

 

Work Harder by Zach Dubois –  

Better Man by Sixx AM – 

Oh Lord by NF – 

Boxes by Goo Goo Dolls – 

Better Than Yourself by Lukas Graham – 

Break On Me by Keith Urban – 

Beautiful Day by Take 6 –