Learning From Disappointments

My wife, Kim, ran the TCS New York City Marathon on November 1st. She wanted to do 3:30 and was on pace for it for 14 miles then…IMG_0572IMG_0568

I call Kim the 7:30 per mile runner. She runs on a treadmill so much that she almost always is in that area. It doesn’t matter if she runs a 5k, 10k or 13.1 miles (half marathon). Her pace per mile is always within 2-3 seconds of 7:30. I pushed her, as well as a couple friend runners, to get out of that zone and she did.  During training she actually ran a 5k race under 7:00 per mile and she did a couple long runs where she was in the low 7:10 range. Even on her longer run of 17-18 miles she was doing 7:40-7:45 miles.   A couple training runs her left leg would give out on her for a second but we didn’t think much of it.

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For the first time ever she actually scaled back before a race. She only ran 9 miles the week of the race, and usually she would do 20-25. She did everything right for this race. She was going to hit her goal of 3:30.

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Then mile 14 her leg started to give out. By the time she reached where we were at mile 16 she looked at me and said pain and pointed to her left leg.  Then at mile 19 she actually stopped and texted me PAIN!!!!  Maybe she should’ve stopped but I know her and if you are a runner you know you won’t stop unless you are dead. She had to walk several times and actually had some miles that were 12-13:00 minutes. She did finish in 4:17, by far her worst marathon but it was still an experience.

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My wife took it hard. If you know her you know she was mad, sad, disappointed, and heart-broken. She felt physically, mentally and spiritually broken…for a minute. Then she said she won’t let this define her or who she is. This is just one race.

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Which brings me to today’s topic. We all have disappointments. Times when someone or something lets you down. Times when we think God has let us down. Times when our whole being is tested. Times when we think our whole world is falling apart.

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How you respond is how you will live your life. You can get right back up or you can wallow in your defeat. You can get mad at everyone around you or you can welcome them into your home so they can encourage you and help pick you up.  You can turn away from God or you can get closer to God.

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How will you let your disappointments, setback and failures define you? Do you forgive those that disappoint you? Do you forgive yourself for your own disappointments, mistakes, setbacks?

Do you let it define who you are in God? God only sees you as His child. He loves you and wants you to succeed. Like any parent though, sometimes He lets you do it on your own so that your character will grow.

Stay tuned to tomorrow for Kim’s perspective.

It’s Not Over Yet by For King & Country – 

These Times by Safety Suit – 

I Turn Everything Over by Switchfoot – 

It’s My Life by Paula Cole – 

Right Here Right Now by Matty Mullins – 

What I’ve Overcome by Fireflight – 

Get It Right by Brendan James – 

You Don’t Define Me by Mindy Gledhill – 

Be Me by Syleena Johnson – 

Don’t Count Me Out by Downtown Fiction – 

Mirror by BarlowGirl – 

Least of These by Todd Agnew – 

Our Trip To New York City

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Today I will just talk about our trip. Tomorrow I will talk about the marathon. First I will say my legs were tired. A lot of walking. The subways were easier than I thought they would be. We didn’t get lost any. The only person we met that was rude was the subway ticket guy our first day. He asked how many rides do you want? I don’t know, there are four of us and we want to go to 9/11 Memorial which I know is where this train stops. He says it doesn’t matter where you are going, how many rides do you want? I don’t know I said, how many does it take? He says it depends on how many rides you want. At this point I thought about saying I didn’t know this was an amusement park but the Christian in me just smiled and said I guess two for each of us. He gives me a subway card with two rides on it. I said I need eight since there are four of us and he goes why didn’t you say that in the first place. Only thing I could do was smile and say have a nice day. I definitely recommend getting a NYC Pass if you go. For one fee you get to see over 80 sites instead of paying a small fortune to see them individually.

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After that though everyone was friendly and helpful. If we had a question we would ask someone and they always pointed us in the right direction. Something my gps on the phone didn’t always do. When Kylie and I went to Madame Tussauds wax museum I knew about where it was from being in Times Square the night before. However, the gps had us go two blocks in the opposite direction before I realized we were going the wrong way. I should’ve realized it when we were walking away from Times Square but Kylie and I were talking and having fun and saw some other places along the way.

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One of the most amazing things to see for me was the 9/11 Memorial and the new World Trade Centers. Just to be where of one of the most horrific events in America’s history happened. It was humbling to be in the spot where so many perished and so many were hurt, and to know God was there through all of it. To know so many were saved by the heroic efforts of so many firefighters, policeman, paramedics and everyone else that helped sort through the rubble and debris for hours on end. It was amazing to see how close St. Paul’s Cathedral is to the WTC and to know it wasn’t touched by the evil of that day but was instead used by so many to find comfort, rest, food, etc. during the clean up. I don’t know if this is intentional on the new WTC or if it was the way the light shined on it that day we were there or what but there is/was a cross on it that day.

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Our first day we went to the expo to pick up Kim’s race day packet. We then went to ground zero, Statute of Liberty from a distance, St. Paul’s Cathedral and Times Square that evening.

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Our second day we were up early and went to the Empire State Building, road The Ride inside it, went to Rockefeller Center and Top of the Rock, St Patrick’s Cathedral and Central Park as a family.

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Then that evening while my mom rested and Kim rested for the marathon Kylie and I went back out by ourselves to Times Square and Madame Tussauds Wax Museum.

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Sunday morning was race day for Kim so we had a lot of time to explore Central Park more while we waited for the runners.

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No music today but I will leave you with some more pics.

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New, forgotten, unknown 10/30/15 – New Music Friday

A few new musician followers this week.  I hope my sharing your music will get word out about your music. Please take time to listen/share/purchase the song I wrote with the wonderful Lily Messer and Ceylon Wise at the bottom of this page.  Thanks for the follows.

Many Moons Ago by Erin Kelly – 

Step by Step by The Shanks – 

Ain’t No Sunshine by The Phantom Trap – 

Some non-followers I have been listening to this week.

Through The Window by Chris Cornell – 

35 MPH Town by Toby Keith  – 

Where You’ve Always Been by Annie Moses Band – 

TShirt Weather by Circa Waves – 

Fear by Ben Rector – 

Hold Them Close by Building 429 – 

AYTA by Collective Soul – 

Speak The Word by Denise Renee – 

I Feel Love by The Dead Weather – 

Make Me A Believe by Andy Mineo – 

and our song:

I Question You by Lily Messer – 

Now on i tunes :  https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/i-question-you-single/id1018588943

The Mask

This is my last Halloween post. I hope you enjoyed the stories. If you missed any be sure to go back and check out The Maze, The Funhouse of Mirrors and The Haunted House.

Even though I am no Edgar Allan Poe this is the scariest yet ( but don’t worry, it has a happy ending.)  We all wear masks! This mask story is just one of many I could tell. It is a true story and it could happen to you. Not that the other stories weren’t true- that’s up for you to decide. Reader beware!

You wake up each morning                                                                                                  Ignore all the warnings

With a smile on your face                                                                                                           Our love was being replaced

Breakfast made and the kids are dressed                                                                             Don’t even know their lives are about to be a mess

Out the door they go to school                                                                                                   You let the devil make you a fool

I come home from work                                                                                                           But you’ve been digging in dirt

You show me that beautiful smile                                                                                         Right now, you are just in denial

You wear a mask of past shames                                                                                            Yet, you continue to play games

You say you aren’t the one to blame                                                                                          The mask of your past caused this pain

You where the mask of lies and deceive                                                                                 Your family is the one you leave

You’re wearing a mask                                                                                                                 Did you think this would last?

But you can’t hide it well                                                                                                             Did you think I couldn’t tell?

Oh love, what have you done?                                                                                                    Was it all just for fun?

You’re tearing our world apart                                                                                                   You’re breaking our kids hearts

Fast forward through the hurt and lies                                                                                   Fast forward through the tears we cried

Fast forward through the pain                                                                                                   What did you think you had to gain?

I gave up and God stepped in                                                                                                  “Now let me take all this sin, ”

He whispered to me “it’s not about you,                                                                                  I want you to  stay until I am through”

He walked us through the dirt and mud                                                                           Our love went from ashes to a bud

You removed the mask you wore so long                                                                               Now you are back with God where you belong

Through all His redeeming grace                                                                                              Our marriage found a new starting place

So my friends what can I say?                                                                                                  You have to pray to God each day

What can get you through the worst?                                                                                       In your marriage, God must come first

Don’t fall for the tricks of the evil one                                                                                     Don’t let your marriage come undone

His words are smooth but they are not true                                                                           Don’t let the devil come between God and you

Be careful of the seeds you sow                                                                                             Guard your heart with the truth you know

Be careful of the mask you wear                                                                                           Let Jesus carry the cross you bear

Remember when you first fell in love                                                                                       Love each other, look to God above

Don’t let the devil come and destroy                                                                                   Don’t fall for his games, his ploys

Even though you once believed he who lied                                                                    Because of God, our marriage survived

The devil tried but he isn’t winning                                                                                          With God our end became a new beginning

This story is scary because it is true                                                                                        I will pray it doesn’t happen to you

But if it does, it doesn’t have to be the end of your story                                                 Let God use your struggles and pain for His glory

If I Told You by Jason Walker – The perfect song for this post. Please listen.

Masqerade by Jonathan Thulin – 

Change This Heart by Sidewalk Prophets – 

You Are Loved by Stars Go Dim – 

Behind The Mask by Eric Clapton – 

Something More by Secondhand Serenade – 

You Don’t Know How Beautiful You Are by Jon Foreman – 

Sick Charade by Letter Black – 

The Real Me by Natalie Grant – 

In A Hole Again by Tesla – 

Giving It Up by Kristian Bush – 

Love Heals Your Heart by Third Day – 

First Song I Sing by Sara Groves – 

Give Me Jesus by Jeremy Camp – 

You Loved Me First by MikesChair – 

Temple Fit Tip Of The Week 10/28

As always, let’s start off with a review.

Week 1 : Drink more water, less sugary drinks.                                                             Week 2: eat less by using smaller plates.                                                                              Week 3:  Move, just be active. Don’t have time, work out during commercials.  Week 4 : have the courage to start. It takes guts to say you don’t want to be unhealthy anymore and to take that first step.                                                                     Week 5 : Sleep. Sleep has many benefits to a healthy lifestyle.

This week I turned to a friend of ours, Dr. Deanna Osborne, to help me out on what we put in our bodies and how it affects your health. A little about Deanna :

Dr. Deanna Osborn graduated from Ohio University Heritage College of Osteopathic Medicine, is a board certified family practice physician and has completed the coursework leading to a Functional Medicine Fellowship. When as a young mother and physician she was struggling with serious medical issues, her field held no answers for restoring her health.  Faced with her own health dilemma, Dr. Deanna discovered the importance of hormone balance, nutritional healing, and how simple lifestyle changes could restore her health. Dr. Deanna has proven that if you give the body what it needs or is lacking, it will heal itself. Today she practices part time in the area of Functional Medicine, specializing in bioidentical hormone balance, whole body detoxification, and the  reversal of inflammation within the body.

I checked out her website deannaosborn.com and have posted these two blogs with her permission. If you have a chance to purchase her book and learn more about natural foods and medicines for your health, I would highly recommend it.

Why would I recommend it?

Today’s doctors are so busy they spend less than eight minutes with each patient. While studies have shown that patient satisfaction and outcomes suffer, and inappropriate prescribing increases when doctors spend less time with their patients, there may be even longer-term repercussions of such hurried interactions.The American health care system is all business. Unfortunately, the industry values treatment over prevention and drugs over lifestyle changes. The end result for patients isn’t ideal, as they end up taking more and more drugs to treat an illness, without addressing its root cause. For example, many of America’s most deadly diseases, like diabetes and cardiovascular disease, are largely caused by poor diet.

Let’s not get me talking about our foods we eat. I have mentioned in other posts about GMO’s and food ingredients that the United States FDA allows to be put in our foods but are banned in other countries around the world. In order to keep this post shorter, I will leave it at that.

It’s More Than Genes

Posted by on Jun 1, 2015 in Functional Medicine, Nutrition | 0 comments

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I often hear the argument, “Well, Grandma never took supplements and she lived to be 95.” This is based on the false hypothesis that your health depends entirely on your genetic make-up. So, if Grandma was healthy, you will be too. Yes, your genes matter, but the trigger points for chronic illness such as diabetes and heart disease are clearly directed by what you are feeding your body. And it is a fact that the food your Grandma fed her body is no longer widely available to you. Food has changed nutritionally, genetically, and chemically.

Today the food system is compromised. The nutrition required by all of us for health and well-being is becoming harder and harder to access commercially. Knowing your farmers, meat producers, and other food providers is becoming critical to maintaining health and avoiding chronic diseases of the industrialized world. Food should be a restorative and healing fuel for the body, not for comfort, relief, or social entertainment in a high-pressure society. As you read our blog and if you purchase the book, you learn that one of the most difficult truths for many people to accept is: food can be the most powerful form of medicine or the slowest form of poison.

Do you have the same vigor and energy you had just a few years ago? Do you look at your aging body and declining energy as simply the evidence of the passage of years? Please know, most people should have a much higher level of health and well-being, which is achievable by following a few simple guidelines. My aim is to help your body operate at peak levels, age naturally and avoid disease. My understanding of health and well-being has changed since I began to practice medicine. Over the past ten years, I have learned more about “alternative” health and disease prevention than I did in the traditional study of medicine at school.My continual hope for this blog and my Healing Handbook is that they will equip you to know how to make well- informed decisions about their life and health maintenance, keeping you from poor operational function and ultimately disease.

Join with us and learn how to bring your body back to health. To order a copy of Dr. Deanna’s Healing Handbook visit http://deannaosborn.com/healing-handbook/

Hair loss….at my age!?

Posted by on Aug 25, 2015 in Functional Medicine, Nutrition | 0 comments

Hair

Greetings readers! I wanted to share with you a story of a 16 year old patient of mine. We’ll call her Chloe. Chloe came to see me because she was having hair loss, or spotty alopecia. She had been seeing a dermatologist for her hair loss and after trying many things the dermatologist had resulted to doing steroid injections into her scalp on the bald spots. While this therapy worked for the hair loss, it was leaving boggy spots on her scalp that felt funny. Both Chloe and her mother knew this was not a long term solution to the problem, but rather a Band-Aid approach.

I recommended two types of testing. I had Chloe do our complete nutritional panel (also called micronutrient testing) and genetic testing. The total cost for this testing was about $500. The results…..AMAZING! As it turns out, Chloe was severely deficient in B vitamins, several key nutrients and copper. Copper can be a cause of hair loss as can some of the B vitamins. She had several genetic enzyme deficiencies that were the cause of her B vitamin deficiency.

Chloe started a nutritional program that included a gluten free diet, vitamin supplementation, copper supplementation and lifestyle changes. Upon returning for follow up visit her hair loss had stopped completely, her skin had cleared completely, and she reported feeling much better overall. At her 6 month follow up appointment, her hair issue was completely resolved and she reported that her ADD had improved dramatically. In fact, she reported getting all A’s on her final exams! She had previously been a struggling student with an Individualize Education Program (IEP). She still has an IEP at school, but it is my belief that much of her cognitive issues were a result of her extreme malnutrition. Chloe and Chloe’s family have subsequently become one of my greatest sources of referral in my practice.

It is stories like Chloe’s that make me excited to work with patients every day. When we give the body what it needs, it has tremendous power to heal itself!

The Haunted House

Animated Haunted House animated house gif halloween haunted

I have been in the house many times since the first time. The first time was when I was eight years old. I was being teased, called a chicken, and all those things kids say to each other. Triple dog dare. You can’t turn down a triple dog dare. It was the first time I opened the door. I only looked inside for a second but that was enough.  The door had been opened and my future was doomed.

I soon started visiting the house more than I would like to admit. Always by myself of course. I couldn’t let my friends know what I was doing. Each time I went in I would find a new room to explore. It was fascinating at first. All these new things I was finding meant I was also learning more about myself. I thought I was being brave. Anytime something would happen to me I would run to the solitude of the house. Only in the day time though. Never at night.

At night you could always find me in my own house. Safe, warm and comfortable. My parents loved me and I felt safe in my house. Of course you could say as many times as I was visiting the so-called haunted house that it became my home away from home. My place to go to be alone and collect my thoughts. Leave some of my thoughts there. Come out a new person, but I left a part of me in that house each time I went.

It wasn’t long before I was sneaking out of my home and going to my haunted house at night. I couldn’t help it. I loved being the only one there. The only one that knew I was spending so much time there was me. I loved that sometimes when I went there would be a new room or two to explore. I never questioned how they got there. Part of the mystery of a haunted house I thought.

I started to withdraw from my friends so I could spend more time there. I could explore my house for hours on end, always something new but I could also go back and remember. Remember the who, what, why,  where and when of the first time I opened this door or that door. Remember when I was so scared I slammed that door closed, only to peek back in a few weeks later. No door was ever sealed shut. I could visit anytime I would visit the house.

The problem came when I couldn’t resist the house anymore. It just kept luring me in. Like it was calling out to me. Come on in, it is safe here. You don’t need anyone else. Just you and your thoughts, that’s all you need. No one will hurt you in here.

Comfort. I found comfort in that house. I should’ve bought the place and moved in. Saved me from going there all the time. It was on one of these trips that I met someone. A man like I had never met before. He told me to stop going to the haunted house. There is nothing there for me. How did he know was my first thought. My second thought was who cares who he is. This was my world and my house and he was just an intruder. Another person out to get me.

A couple days later I was going back to the house and there he was. Sitting on the front steps. The same steps I first went up when I was eight, except they didn’t look so scary anymore. They almost looked warm and inviting. Anyway, back to my guest. There he was. “How did you get here,” I asked. “I’ve been watching you for years,” he said. What kind of person is this?  I then bluntly told him to leave. He wasn’t welcome here. He told me he couldn’t do that. He was here to help me leave this place, leave it for good.

No way. This is my place. My home. He had no right to ask me to leave it.

But he got me thinking. In my experience, that is never a good thing. I would rather just go to my house and leave my thoughts in one of the rooms.

I walked on by him and he got up and followed me in. “Look at your prison,” he said. “My prison? This is my house,” I corrected him.  “No”, he said, “I have a much better house for you. Want to see it?”

“Not really sure,” I said, “I like this place.”

“Here take my hand and I will show you,” he said. I don’t know why but I reached out for his hand and….all the doors opened. All the doors in my house flew open and everything that was in them came pouring out.

I screamed, “let me go!!” I pulled my hand away and ran. This wasn’t my house. How did all these things get in here? Why was he letting them all out? I tried to shut the doors but they would not close. I fell to my knees and let them overtake me. But they didn’t touch me. They all poured into him. He took them all. All my good and all my bad. All my pretty and all my ugly. They all poured into him.

I watched, mesmerized. It seemed like it lasted for hours but it couldn’t have been more than a few seconds. How could I let all this stuff in my house? I watched as everything flew out. Things I forgot I put in the rooms. Things that kept me a prisoner in my house. Fear, lots of rooms full of fear. Anxiety, worry, hurt all leaving my house. Negative thoughts and lies I believed to numb the pain all gone. Depression, shame, guilt- all gone. Anger and hate, see you later. Regrets, doubts about who I am, lies, distrust, unforgiveness, all gone.

You might ask what was left but you already know. Love was left. A love that told me I didn’t need to live in this house. A love that told me I was forgiven. A love that showed me who I am. A love that told me to unlock those doors and throw away the key. A love that told me my house isn’t haunted. A love that told me I could’ve left that house anytime I wanted. A love that told me I never had to build that house.

Mansion by NF – 

My Own Prison by Creed – 

Empire In My Mind by The Wallflowers – 

Demons by Imagine Dragons – 

Baptize My Mind by Jon Foreman – 

Change Your Mind by Sister Hazel – 

Keep Your Mind Wide Open by Annasophia Robb – 

Outta My Mind by Anthem Lights – 

Peace Of Mind by Decemberadio – 

Voices by Sumerlin – 

Hearing Voices by Anberlin –  

March Out Of The Darkness by Papa Roach – 

Out Of Mind by Queensryche – 

Daughters

I have four daughters and two grand-daughters. I have tried to get the words together about women and self-esteem and about being loved and accepted by God but I can’t seem to get out what I want to say. I did remember reading something a long time ago on Facebook and I couldn’t recall where I saw it. I looked on Boundless and Proverbs 31 but nothing. I searched and searched and just when I was about to give up, my wife had a Facebook memory come up two days ago and guess what was on it? The thing I was looking for that she had shared so now I know what the site is and where to look. Yes, it is amazing how God works. Just when I was about to give up my search, there it was.  Anyway, it is called the Loop and I think every woman should read their posts just to know who they are in God.

Here it is:

Loop

You are Beautiful

My daughter, you are the one I made. You are the one I crafted. You are the one I adorn with garlands, with beauty I see, with beauty that sweeps Me off my feet.

I love you.

I love you.

And there is not guilt and cost and expectation in it. I love you because I do. You can’t alter it. You can’t change Me. You are what I have made, and I love what I have made.

Look up now, not down. I mean this:

I love you.

Like this.

How you are.

Right now.

There is nothing to chase down, my love. There is nothing to earn or improve or repair. I create. I heal what I have made. Let me lean in, place my hand upon your heart.

I was there when you believed, for the first time, you weren’t beautiful. I was there, the second time, and the next time, too. I want you to know, I was there.

I was there when my daughter, whom I crafted, whom I adore, whom I formed and designed and shape ever still, believed she was less than what she should be. Less perfect, less valued, less worthy than. . . Less than whom? Less than what, my daughter?

You are beautiful because I made you. You are exquisite because I shaped you. You are worthy because I say so. I chose you. I chose to make you.

You.

And daughter, I don’t make mistakes.

My love, hold my hand. See how I extend it to you, and I love to be with you.

My beautiful one.

My daughter.

“I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well” (Psalm 139:14).

You Are Made To Shine by The Sonflowerez – 

Dove Real Beauty Sketches – 

My Dear by Matty Mullins – 

Daughter Of The King by Tricia Brock – 

Who I Am by Blanca – 

His Daughter by Molly Kate Kestner – 

Flawless by MercyMe – 

More Beautiful You by Jonny Diaz – 

Dear Daughter by Halestorm – 

Furious Love by Veridia – 

So Beautiful by Superchick – 

Aim Higher by The Browns – 

New, forgotten, unknown 10/23/15 – New Music Friday

A few more musician followers this week. I appreciate the non-musician followers as well, I just can’t show my appreciation by sharing your words as easily. I hope my sharing your music will get word out about your music. Please take time to listen/share/purchase the song I wrote with the wonderful Lily Messer and Ceylon Wise at the bottom of this page.  Thanks for the follows.

Heartfelt by Read B. Verses – 

Pretty Reckless by Kiana – 

Getting To Know You by Lanny Swaim – 

Mercy by J. Crum – 

Dream Big by Hellena –  

and some musicians I have been listening to that are non-followers (yet to be followers 🙂 )  Two weeks worth. Forgot to send out a second edition last week.

Dollhouse by Melanie Martinez – 

Oh No Run by Bring Me The Horizon – 

Roman Holiday by Halsey – 

WooHoo by Never Shout Never –  

You Kill Me With Silence by Duran Duran – 

After You Fall by Janet Jackson – 

All I Really Want by Tim Timmons – 

Among the Believers by Darlene Love – 

Anything At All by Motion City Soundtrack – 

I Feel Good by Thomas Rhett – 

Hitchhiker by OMI – 

Camouflage by Selena Gomez – 

Grace Beneath The Pines by Glen Hansard – 

As Time Goes by JR JR – 

Cracked by Pentatonix – 

and our song:

I Question You by Lily Messer – 

Now on i tunes :  https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/i-question-you-single/id1018588943

Temple Fit Tip Of The Week 10/22

Review:

  1. Drink water instead of sugary drinks. Aim for half your body weight in ounces.
  2. Eat less by using smaller plates.
  3. Move.  Don’t have to kill yourself, just move. Exercise during commercial breaks instead of sitting on the couch. Be active.
  4. Be courageous. It takes courage to admit you aren’t where you want to be and to take the steps to get to where you want to be.

Sleep. Sleep and sleep. You have to make sure you are getting the right amount of sleep for you. I know what is recommended, 7-8 hours a night, but it varies from person to person. I know I seem to function better with 5-6. Others can’t function without 9-10. The more I sleep, the more tired I feel. If I sleep 9 hours, I feel tired all day. Listen to your body. Sleep helps your brain. Sleep helps your body recover and repair your muscles from your workout. I know from my experience and my wife’s experiences and my active children’s experiences that we do not have a problem falling asleep. We are active and by the time 9:30-10:00 hits, we are ready for bed and we fall asleep quick.

What happens when you don’t get enough sleep? You are too tired to be active. Your mind says sleep instead of work out. Your body will crave unhealthy choices (sugar, energy drinks, etc.) to try to stay awake. What do you usually eat late at night while watching a movie or something? Junk food.

Anyway, here are some articles for you to check out. Have a blessed and active week.

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2014/07/20/sleep-loss-weight-gain/7507503/

http://www.shape.com/lifestyle/mind-and-body/why-sleep-no-1-most-important-thing-better-body

http://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/features/9-reasons-to-sleep-more

http://www.webmd.com/fitness-exercise/sleep-athletic-performance

The Funhouse of Mirrors

sites at the local fair ground - I never liked to funhouse.  But if I was with friends I went in them and rode rides anyway.  Nana

“Step right up, come on in, only a dollar” shouted the carny. He looked right at me and my friends. “Come on in boys, this will change your life” and he winked at me. I don’t know but my gut was telling me something was wrong. My friends wanted to go in and since I didn’t want to be left out, I went in with them.

It wasn’t much at first. A conveyor belt going the opposite direction. Oooh scary right? We made a tight turn to the right and the floor started shaking. Everyone started to laugh but the feeling inside me was getting worse. It was then the lights went out. We started reaching out, touching each other to make sure we were all still there. We slowly inched forward and hit a wall, promptly piling into each other.  Then the lights came on and that was when the fun began.

Image result for carnival fun house mirrors

We were looking at ourselves, all four versions of each of us. We looked at each other like what the crap, a couple of my friends used some other choice words. In one mirror there was me, looking as normal as I am now, if you can call that normal. In the second mirror I was a hideous monster. What the heck? The third mirror I was a baseball player, uniform, glove and all. How could this be? I only was wearing the clothes I came in with. The fourth mirror showed me as an old, decrepit old man, all by myself. It was then we realized there was no exit. We did the only thing we could and started to push on the mirrors. The only one that moved was the second one. We all looked at each other and kind of shrugged and took a step through. But we weren’t all together on the other side.

There I was, the hideous monster. I pulled on my skin and clothes to get them to come off but they were me and I was them. It was then I noticed a small light in the distance. I walked toward it and saw it was a cell phone. It had a note on it. PRESS PLAY. What I saw disgusted me and I wish I didn’t have to tell you about it, but I do. It was 15 second clips of my life. There was me eight years old pushing the other kids down on the playground. There was me twelve years old stealing a cassette from the local music store. There was me sixteen years old with my girlfriend. We were in the backseat and she said she wasn’t ready but I said we had already gone too far so let’s keep going. There was me at nineteen at a college party when a bunch of guys took a passed out girl upstairs and I didn’t stop them. There was me at twenty two when I didn’t take the keys from my friend and he drove home drunk, but he didn’t make it. There was me at home instead of visiting my dad before he passed away. There was me watching a movie instead of calling a friend who was home alone, waiting for me to call. There was me ignoring my wife because of past mistakes. Was I really this monster? Is this how others see me?

Then we were all back in the same room of mirrors. We all looked at each other like what was that? No one was laughing now. We pushed on the mirrors again but only the third one opened this time.

There I was, at Wrigley Field, pitching for the Cubs. The crowd was chanting my name. Oh yeah, this is what I was made for. They all love me. I was on the mound, World Series, game seven, bottom of the ninth, two outs, two on, two strikes. One more strike and I bring a championship to Chicago. The wind up, the pitch…and I heard it. My shoulder popped. Then I heard the crack of the bat as it connected to the ball. Then I heard the silence. Just like that it was all over. The game, my career, my life. I was so angry. I was mad at God. How could He bring me to this moment and then let it all go? One pitch. It was all over. What kind of God would do that to me? I shut everyone out. I drank myself to sleep every night. I didn’t know the women’s names I would wake up to. I didn’t care. I went from 60,000 people screaming my name to the deafening silence of my own thoughts.

There we were again. All six of us in the same room of mirrors. Mark said that wasn’t so bad. “Let’s get this over with,” said Scott. We looked at each other and hesitantly stepped into the fourth mirror.

There I was. A decrepit old man. No one there but me. A lifetime of choices led me to here. A lifetime of bad choices. How did I get here? I was a good guy once. I believed in God, once upon a time. I looked in the mirror and the mirror looked back. Was this really me? Then I was gone. There in my casket, all by myself. Honestly, all by myself. No one came to say goodbye. Not one single person! Was I that unloveable and selfish? Was I really that bad of a person? I guess the truth hurts because I must’ve been for not one single person to show up.

We were all back in the room of mirrors. A couple of my friends said how cool their mirrors were. They hope their lives turn out like that. I didn’t have anything to say. This time the first mirror, the normal mirror, opened and we walked through. A couple turns and a few distorted mirrors later we were at the exit.

“Hey boys, how’d you like it? Did you like what you saw?” said the carny. “The mirrors don’t lie boys. If you didn’t like what you saw, you still have time to do something about it.” That was when he looked at me again and winked and gave me something. I was too terrified to look at it so I stuck it in my pocket and left. He turned around and started shouting , “step right up boys and girls, come on in, only a dollar and it will change your life.”

I forgot about what he gave me until I got home and undressed. It fell out of my pocket. A small bible with a note inside. Read this if you want to change your life. Read this if you didn’t like what you saw in the mirrors. It is your choice.

Monster by Skillet – 

All Of Me by Meatloaf – 

Ain’t Much Left Of Me by Blackberry Smoke – 

These Things I Hate (Revolves Around Me) by Bullet For My Valentine – 

Chip Away by Julliet – 

Hate Me by Blue October – 

Faces by One Less Reason – 

Objects In The Rearview Mirror by Meatloaf – 

I’ll Find Me by Steve Azar – 

Sing by Waiting Hill – 

I Remember Me by Jennifer Hudson –  

I Hope They Get To Me In Time by Darius Rucker – 

Mirrors by Justin Timberlake – 

Funhouse Mirror by Jill K – 

I Choose You by Point of Grace –