What Do You Want – My God, My Music, My Life

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Dear God,

Can you believe this year is half way over already? It won’t be long until we see Christmas decorations on the shelves. It seems to start earlier and earlier each year.

Well, where to begin? I started this year off strong. I had a million things I wanted to do and be. I wanted to write more and send some of my stories to publishers and maybe find someone to do a demo of one of my songs. I wanted to save money for Christmas so I would not have to charge any gifts this year and stay out of debt. I wanted to get closer to my wife. I wanted to read the bible more. I wanted to be able to run again. Let me rephrase that, I wanted to run a race again without being hurt and to run it competitively like I used to. I wanted to call home more. I wanted …

I wanted…I wanted….I wanted…

Well, you know what has happened? None of that. None of it even has come close to happening. In fact, I have written less. Most days I think what’s the point. These words aren’t ever going to make a difference anyway. Every time I save a dollar something happens where I have to spend two. I still don’t talk like I should. I haven’t read a bible devotion in months. I haven’t even taken a step to run in months. I am thankful I can walk but I want to run.

So, all things I have wanted to do so far this year have not come close to happening.

So, God, what do you want? What do you want me to do? The last half of the year is all about what you want. I will put my wants aside and will listen to what you want.

Here I am, speak to me, lead me, show me your ways. Here I am.

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