My name is Michael. You can call me Mike if you would like. I’m the monster that lives under your bed.

Don’t get me confused with Ted, the monster in your closet. He could never fit under your bed. He’s also afraid of the light. I, however, am not afraid of the light.

Don’t get me confused with Kelly either. She’s the monster in the corner. I wouldn’t really call her a monster. Seriously, she hides right out in the open. Not much creativity there.

Don’t get me confused with Brad, the bogeyman. Between you and me, Brad isn’t real. Let’s not waste any more time on him.

Now back to me. Mike, the monster under your bed. I am free to roam the house anytime I want. Can I tell you something really scary? It’s the monsters, I mean people, on top of the bed that are the scariest. Way scarier than I have ever thought about being.

The mean, terrible, and horrible things I have seen them do scare me. I would never think of doing the things they do. Not even crossed my mind. Not once.

In fact, I have changed my ways. When the monsters on top of your bed scare you, I will be the protector under your bed.

Yes, I like that. Mike, the protector under your bed. Now go to sleep. Sweet dreams.